Author: Daycare Lady

At one point in my career I lived beside an Extended Care Home. The location was great for daycare parents that worked there, and the quiet neighborhood was a nice fit for my family and I. I started to notice aged faces peaking threw their curtains smiling at the children arriving for the day. The same seniors would again watch as we would go for walks to the park. You could see their joy with each little person that would smile back. My heart hurt for the elderly on lookers, knowing if they could have the opportunity to be a part of these little lives, they would.

Taking the opportunity on a beautiful sunny day to go for a walk, we decided to take the long way. Walking the block around the Care Home, those beautiful faces started to peer through their windows. The kids decided to wave at them and the residents waved back with big smiles on their faces. As soon as we noticed some of the Seniors sitting in the gated garden we decided to walk by and sing. The kids sang the alphabet, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, You are my Sunshine, and more. Some of the Seniors chimed in singing, or clapping their hands, enjoying the impromptu show. It didn’t take long for the kids to become restless and we had to head to the park to play. Goodbyes were a smile, a wave, and a promise to return soon.

The detour for our walks became a constant addition. The children would ask for us to sing different songs, smiling through them all. There were times we would get invited into the gated garden to sing, and everyone would gather to listen. The audience began to increase with each song the children would sing. The parents of these children appreciated the protected exposure for their children, loving the idea of bridging the gap. Shy children embraced the opportunity to dance and laugh in the new environment. The children loved their new singing partners. Different generations in harmony together. Music is a language for all to enjoy:)

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It started with good intention. Creativity is an element of my daycare that is often explored. Some crafts are easy, go off without a hitch, fun little keepsakes for the kids and their parents. We try to use recycling as much as possible with crafting so when I came across this new idea, I didn’t hesitate. However, some crafts require a little more thought…. Enter in Paper Mache and toddlers, not the best decision on my part lol.

Monday had started with the excitement of knowing we were going to embark on a new style of craft. Being aware this was a big craft, I had let the parents know that this would be a play clothes kind of week. Having gathered newspapers from recycling, I was excited for another opportunity to show the kids about repurposing items. Nothing could have prepared me for the sheer mess this paper mache project was going to be.

The kids were excited to pick out their balloons, and to start tearing the newspaper into long strips. Step one had gone well. Step two, preparing the flour and water mixture, had gotten a little messier, but it was done. Now came the construction phase 🙂 My goodness this was definitely turning into a lot of work! Soaking the newspaper strips, trying to get them to stay on the balloons, and stopping the paste from spilling was quite the feat! Wishing I had thought this craft through a little more thoroughly, I knew I had to see it to completion. Before too long I realized this was an incredibly messy craft! Thinking ahead we put all of the shredded newspaper into a bucket and covered it with the paste. Grabbing garbage bags I popped holes into the tops and sides and slid them over the children’s clothing.

Needless to say the paper mache craft was a world of fun! The kids loved mucking in the paste soaked newspaper, and piling it all over their balloons. It didn’t take long and my table was covered in bits of paper, the floor soaked from paste, their little hands incredibly sticky, and it was only day one. Apply soaked paper, let it dry, apply more soaked paper, let it dry again, and so on, and so on. For four days this process happened, for four days the cleanup was exhausting. Little helpers putting their balloons on a shelf to dry. Scraping dried paper off the table. We finally popped our balloons, and painted our craft. The end reward for me was insight.

Although I have never embarked on this kind of craft again, it ended up being a pretty cool keepsake. For many days after, I continued to find bits of newspaper like confetti in my kitchen.

Breakfast is an important meal to start the day. Trying to get yourself and your family dressed, teeth and hair brushed, fed, and out the door can be an insurmountable hurdle. Many families will ask if there children can have breakfast at my house so they can alleviate at least one pressure off of the morning, or if its okay for them to come in their pajamas etc…

Friday morning, Dad comes rushing in, “I am sorry we are running late, here is their clothes, they had breakfast already. I am so incredibly late!”. I grabbed the bag, the children, and off Dad ran. Looking down at two sweet little chocolate covered faces, I knew my morning was going to be very eventful. I decided to ask the kids what they had for breakfast as I washed them up. They gushed with excitement and delight to reveal they had eaten chocolate cereal that had a chocolate filling! Getting them dressed was also a trying event 🙂 Their energy was absolutely vibrating around them.

Attempting to help them wear off some of their sugar rush proved to be a bit of a challenge. Unfortunately trying to get my own family up and ready for the day just added to the chaos. Once my family had left, we went outside for a walk to the park. Still so much energy, so we did exercises. I was getting exhausted trying to keep up with them. Although they survived, they had a wicked sugar crash on the playroom floor, both of them sleeping for two hours. Time for me to recover 🙂

Explaining to their Mother at pick up that although I understand breakfasts can be fun, so much sugar and caffeine in the morning was probably too much for their little bellies. She looked at me bewildered, so I explained breakfast 🙂 She looked at me in disbelief, explaining that she had had an early meeting so Dad was responsible for breakfast that morning. Shaking her head she apologized. Laughing I told her it was okay, we had survived.

My revenge was sweet. Mom was leaving the following Friday for a girls weekend away. Dad arrived to pick up the children. I smiled as he looked down at their sweet little chocolate bar smiles 🙂

It all started with markers. No one could have told me it would end up being a huge discussion with a parent. As I handed out a coloring page of beautiful spring flowers with a rainbow, I gave instructions that this picture would be our spring display. Using lots of colors was encouraged and expected.

One of my little boys was busy coloring with such fervor that I hated to disturb him. I noticed his rainbow was only blue, black, and grey. Maybe he would use the rest of the colors when he got to his flowers, I thought to myself. Normally I don’t overly critique artwork, unless specific instructions are given ie: pink flowers, etc. Walking around the table noticing the rest of the kids using purples, pinks, yellows, all the colors. Once I made it back to him again, I noticed he was still using the same colors. Deciding it was time to question him about his choices. His answer was not what I expected, he said “I only like to use boy colors now”. I asked him if he could use all the colors, reminding him that “Colors aren’t boys or girls”. But to no avail he insisted on only “boy” colors.

Once they were all hung up his was very prominent. Half expecting his parents to say something about his picture, hoping that between all of us he would see the beauty of using all the colors. Once the end of the day rolled around, and everyone stopped to look at the display, the growing appreciation for their hard work made me very proud of their efforts. As soon as his parents showed up, he beamed and showed them his beautiful artwork, exclaiming “I used all boy colors”. Anticipating a correction from his parents, I stood quietly waiting. NOTHING WAS SAID!

Making it my mission to find creative ways to encourage the use of all colors. He would defiantly go against my wishes, insisting on only his perceived “boy” colors. It was getting so bad that even if his friends wore clothes that were different colors he was calling them names. Finally after countless attempts, numerous corrections, and several weeks, the time had come to address this issue with his parents. His Mom agreed with me, that colors don’t have genders, but his Father failed to see my point of view. Knowing that I needed to be creative in my argument, I explained that my daycare doesn’t put emphasis on gender rolls, just equality. To paraphrase Boys can wear pink, Girls can wear blue, and rainbows have no gender and sport numerous colors. He looked at me, smiled, and conceded in this debate.

Although this little boy no longer referred to colors as boy or girl, he did still love blue, black, and grey. He is allowed to have his own color preferences, that was never the problem. Now he has no issue following instructions that require different colors, understanding colors have no gender.

Every summer I try to come up with new and exciting adventures for all of my littles to go on. Be it a trip to a different park, getting donuts at the bakery, heading to the library, all fun trips. Sometimes our adventures are in our imagination, found in the daycare house and yard. It takes a lot of planning, and preparation to set these kinds of plans into action. When the weather is cooperative I love to try and have picnics 🙂

At this point in my career I had the benefit of having people who worked for me. The forecast was favorable for our first picnic of the summer. To make the picnic a sort of a celebration we had decided to have drive through, McDonald’s to be precise 🙂 You could feel the excitement upon the announcement to the children, it was almost electric! We decided to take them all outside and let them burn off some energy. Setting up the blankets, and getting the wipes ready to clean little faces and hands. Once everything was set up, I could run quickly and get the food.

Pulling up to the drive through with my list in hand, I don’t think the attendant knew what hit them 🙂

“I will have two cheese burger meals with no pickles or condiments, with fries. Three cheeseburger meals with apple slices. Two hamburger meals no onions or mustard, with french fries. Three chicken nugget meals with fries. Two chicken nugget meals with apple slices. The drinks for all meals are as follows, three white milks, three chocolate milks, four apple juices, two orange juices. Plus three full size double cheese burger meals all with ice tea please. Please put all the prizes for the kids meals in a separate bag.”

There was a long pause from the take out microphone, “Is this all one order?” “Yes”, I replied, “Can you read my order back to me, and if possible label the bags?”. I was pretty impressed that he had read the order back correctly and proceeded to go to the first window to pay. The person at the first window read out my total, and read back my order again with a surprised look on their face. Making my way to the next window to get my order I started to giggle. As the attendant handed me all of the happy meals and drink trays, he looks at me, smiles, and says “Are these for your own kids?”. Stifling my laughter, I replied, “Why yes they are”.

It was a picnic like no other! The kids had a blast eating their food, and being able to have more outdoor play time before quiet time. My staff and I enjoyed not having lots of dishes to wash, and just seeing the kids smile as they gobbled up their meals with no fuss. Sometimes the extra expense is worth the happiness from my littles

It didn’t happen very often, but occasionally a family would have to make some tough decisions for daycare. Because of cost, and relationship issues, my services for a family was no longer needed. One particular family of mine went through a separation. Unfortunately with my day home not being a licensed facility, I could not offer subsidy to help offset the cost of childcare.

I am the type of person who constantly thinks about my little ones, no matter the reason for them leaving. Consequently, this particular family was on my mind a lot. When the family started with me, their daughter was broken. The fights in her home life had affected this little soul considerably. As a result the negative atmosphere had caused her to have a lot of separation anxiety. This child had already imprinted on my heart. She was a magical little girl, a child that I new needed loving boundaries. She learned to trust that I had her best interest at heart. So, excitedly, I embraced the task of teaching her how to gain her own voice to discuss her feelings. As this little butterfly started to unfold, her world changed. Alas I was no longer an everyday part, and her family separated.

Mutual friends let me know how they were doing and how this little one had adjusted to the new daycare. All things considered the separation of her parents was necessary for the harmony of her home. I had hoped her anxiety would continue to subside. She grew up, and her life settled into a better routine once she was in school. Satisfied that she was doing okay, I no longer felt the need to constantly check in on her, being appeased with the trickles of news through the grapevine.

Recently I had the opportunity to speak to her Mom. The conversation was amazing, it was nice to know they were doing so well. The Mom confided in me that her only regret through all of the new adjustments was walking away from me as their childcare. Selfishly her ex spouse had insisted on the change, not willing to spend the extra money. As a result, her daughter had regressed into herself for quite a long time. Outwardly her daughter appeared fine, but struggled with anxiety and depression. She proceeded to tell me her daughter, now a young woman, had started counseling to help her through everything. Learning to regain her lost voice. Her daughter had told her that she constantly heard my words echo in her mind, “You are amazing . Talk to me, talk to someone. You matter.”

It is very hard to not get offended when some people make comments about how much daycare costs. So many negative undertones for my chosen profession. No one likes bills, myself included. Admittedly I am a minority for what I charge, a small hourly fee to help offset daycare expenses. But there are times when the comments sting. Bear in mind, I can’t speak for all of us in this profession, I can only speak for myself.

Being in any profession for as long as I have (26+ years) should have resulted in holiday pay, retirement funds, healthcare, and much more. But, Being self employed, working directly with parents, providing top quality care for children, unless I do these incentives for myself, they do not happen. Knowing I am a core teacher in their formative years, I take my position very seriously. Some weeks I work as many as 60+ hours, and I take very little time off. In short, if I don’t work, I don’t get paid.

All the day home’s bills, groceries, crafts, outings, supplies, and all extras come from what parents pay me. Choosing to work out of my own home, as a parent, I got to be home for my children, a choice that was important to me. There were sacrifices that my children had to make, sharing their Mother, their home, and my time. I missed out on so many school concerts, sporting events, and numerous other appointments. Gratefully my spouse was able to attend to all of these, but alas I still felt slighted.

My home was home to many children over the years. Children that grew up and brought me their babies to help raise. All the wear and tear on my home, memories made by all raised in my care. The sacrifices, sometimes harder to swallow than not, felt somehow worth it. When lovingly caring for a sick child so a weary thankful parent could head home to sleep. The chocolate smeared smile from baking, the finger paintings that adorn my wall, the squishy warm leg hugs from my littles.

Yes I am a bill, no I don’t make much money, yes I absolutely love my job. Yes it is your hard earned money that pays me. I give you peace of mind knowing your child is cared for with so much love, and patience. I am worth the money I make, I deserve it, I work hard for it. Most people would not work for what I earn, or give the sacrifices I have. I love my job, my career. Please understand I am not trying to offend anyone, and money is tight for all, but everything I do is to make your children’s lives better. So excuse me if occasionally I roll my eyes when the cost of day homes/daycares are criticized. I know in my heart the work I do is priceless.

Where I live winter can be harsh, and long. So, when the sun shines, its a must to try to get outside. The excitement of going outside can be very exhilarating, but sparse in the winter. Getting children ready creates a high level of anticipation, and energy. Sadly, it also creates a low level of calm in our quest for the great outdoors.

This day was no exception. All seven little faces were smiling from ear to ear, eagerly waiting to make “Snow Angels”. They all lined up taking their turn going to the bathroom putting on their snow suits. It never fails to take at least 30- 45 minutes to get them all ready. From start to finish is a rush, trying to get ready so they don’t turn into hot little puddles. Finally, success, they are dressed and heading up the stairs to go outside.

I try to have them outside for as long as they can tolerate the cold. This particular day was not a very long outing. Soon there was crying because the snow was too deep to walk in, as well as frustration about the snow not being wet enough to build snowmen. Barely having time for myself to come down from the anxiety of trying to get them all dressed, they decided they wanted to go inside. As I gathered them up, I gave them instructions on being patient going in. “Please don’t throw your snow gear on the ground. I need to keep your stuff together. Go down the stairs on your bottoms because your boots are frozen. Please go down carefully”

The children were impatient, pushing each other, throwing their snow gear, and yelling at me for assistance. I got upset, my patience was gone. All of their little faces stared at me in disbelief, shocked because I raised my voice. Taking a deep breath, they were instructed to “Be quiet. Be patient, and wait, I am one person”. As soon as the rush of getting everything put away faded, I asked them to sit. “I am frustrated, and I need to sit and take some deep breaths. Please just sit here for at least 5 minutes, so I can get myself in order. You’re not to blame for me loosing control, but I need you to do this for me.”

Sitting, I took many deep cleansing breaths. They joined me in my calm. Looking over I noticed one of my little boys had his hand up for my attention. Feeling better I called him over, “Sorry, I got upset little one.” Raising my head looking at all the kids while saying, “Actually I am sorry to all of you.” He wrapped his arms around me for a hug and says with all the seriousness a four year old can muster, “It’s okay, my Mom says she looses her sh*t sometimes, so it is okay if you loose your sh*t too when we don’t listen.” The laughter that rang out from me from his raw honesty was better than any deep breaths 🙂

In the early days, things at daycare were a little more primitive. I used old face cloths instead of diaper wipes, cloth diapers with liners instead of disposable, corn starch instead of baby powder, I am sure you get the idea 🙂

Most of my littles were very healthy eaters, and I always let them eat their fill. A favorite was, and still is, pasta with homemade meat sauce. I always added so many vegies to the sauce, onions, pureed brown beans, spinach, etc.

Plate after plate would be served, eaten by tomato stained smiling faces. After washing faces and hands, it was always diaper time for littles with full bellies to get ready for nap.

Now perhaps onions do not quite work that quickly but…… As I was washing down a little bottom, and getting ready to close up the diaper, I decided to put a little cornstarch as a barrier and help keep the skin dry. Just as I raised the child’s legs and added the cornstarch, “Poof”, toot and cornstarch sprinkled the air. Both the little one and I cracked up laughing 🙂